What’s to lose?

Anyone suffering from FOMO? The Great Resignation. Quiet Quitting. The Great Reshuffle. The Big Quit… Seems like everyone’s jacking it in and going off to do something far more interesting. Even British prime ministers are doing it. And there are lots of column inches out there detailing what’s behind it all, be it burnout, dissatisfaction, disengagement, reprioritisation, boredom, or simply better broadband in rural areas these days.

It can make us wonder why we’re sticking around when the desk next to us becomes empty. And that, let’s be clear, is a Good Thing. Thinking through the pros and cons of staying in a role in a very deliberate and mindful way keeps our commitment alive if – like most of us, truth be told – we do indeed decide to stay. Maybe a tweak here or there and bam, we’re re-energised. We know how our role, our team, our organisation fits into our purposeful life and vice versa if we’ve chosen well. If we are in that happy position, Chapeau!, as the HRBP said to the line manager.

But what about if we do decide to make a change? What’s to lose?

Because we will lose something. Embarking on a new way forward – a new role, a new career, a new project, a new relationship, a new goal, a new environment – means giving up something, even if it’s just other options. Does the change of direction justify the cost of that loss? Does venturing into the spicy unknown outweigh the comforts and known parameters of our current selves?

In our REALM model, this is included in Loose – our attitude to change and our readiness for it. Loose as in an athlete, fit and limber, muscles warmed up and ready. In turn, this is all part of our self-awareness. Before we leap, we need to know why, how, and how far we’re leaping. Or not.

Let’s take attitude first. How are we with change in general? When new products or initiatives are launched, are we the first onboard with all the other innovators and early adopters? Or are we slow and cautious, conservative or even sceptical? Does the same breakfast two days in a row give us the heebie-jeebies or does the latest MS update bring us out in a cold sweat?

Change is like an elastic band. Stretch is good. Too often or too much, the band slackens or snaps. For some, change can be disorienting and confusing to the point of being harrowing or even traumatic. At the other end of the spectrum, the need for change can be all-consuming to the extent of being reckless and self-defeating.

Embracing our experience of change and our attitude towards it can help us understand the voices in our head when we are contemplating a new way forward, and better prepare us for it once the decision has been taken. What support will we need? How far are we able to step at each stage? And so on.

Then there’s our readiness for it. How ready are we right now to shift from the here to the there? For once we start to get meaningful about a change event, everything around us suddenly glows so much warmer and twinklier than it did yesterday. That nice, snug spot on the sofa just feels so much cosier and welcoming. As for the boss, well, he ain’t all bad, you know… 

Because on the surface, the status quo will always be the easiest option. Same old same old, but same old that we know. And we can come up with any number of reasons to stay on our current path. Indeed, as we get older, it can seem like we have even more to lose in terms of acquired wealth, relationships, reputation, and other sources of self-identity. Is it truly worth potentially losing any or all of these?

Essentially, in focusing on one new direction, we will inevitably have to give up something or even someone we have once held dear. Determining what we would give up and how prepared we are to do so is crucial to weighing the value of a proposed change and our embrace of it. What are the rewards and what are the punishments?

And usually, when we dig like this, we realise there really is no choice. We are born to learn and adapt and grow. Stagnation, even obsolescence, can accompany lack of change. If we are questioning our direction in the first place, something will have inevitably changed in our environment to lead us down this train of thought. It could have been through loss or achievement – which in itself is another form of loss. 

Change will often come down to being authentic to ourselves and to the ones we love. Are we truly doing what we could be doing? Are we living as fully as we could? If not, we need to jump. Yet we can make all the most incredible plans in the world, but if we are not truly ready to set out on them, we are wasting our time. What’s holding us back? What will help kiss us over the edge into motion? 

Determining our change attitude and readiness are key to a loose way forward. For in our limited time, it’s worth walking a path true to ourselves. And yes, it will likely not be comfortable. It will take resources and effort – a lot of swearing and sweating – but purposeful change is good for us, for those we love, and for those we leave behind. 

It’s good for British prime ministers too. 

Julian

I help people lead their own way forward